Going to the dogs

I did something stupid last week.

I sprung two puppies from animal control and brought them home with me - against Hubby's wishes.

Right now you might be asking yourself - why in the heck did you do that? To this I say in my best doggie voice, just look at those faces! How could I resist???

I've psychoanalyzed myself all week long, and it's probably a combination of things. Those puppies were too cute to stay in that cold stinky shelter a minute longer. I've wanted a second child for years, but with the job losses and Hubby turning 41 this month, time is running out. I'm mourning the loss of my career as I knew it. I'm mourning the loss of Hubby's job. I'm searching for distractions. Maybe - as my mother hinted - I thought getting a dog would take me back to a simpler time in life - when my parents paid all of my bills and cleaned up the dog poop in the yard.

The lesson I learned - aside from not acting on impulse and I can't save all of God's creatures - is that I love my sleep. I need my sleep. I am a train wreck without my sleep. After years of the entire family sleeping through the night again, those puppies were one rude awakening. This leads me to conclude that another baby would be a rude awakening, too.

When I'm 100% honest with myself, having another child is something I fantasize about in theory but don't have the patience or energy to pull off in reality. Without the puppies, I might not have reached that conclusion on my own. Having expressed all of this to Hubby, he is thankful for what we will someday call "the puppy incident of 2008". A little lost sleep and puppy pee on the floor was a small price to pay for the sense of closure I have right now.

No worries... The puppies have a happy ending. They were rescued from a shelter and pampered at our home while I found them both great places to grow up. Just not here.

A visit from Meme and Pepe

When I was in the hospital in labor with Boo, I spoke with my mother several times. She was hopeful that Boo would arrive before midnight, so she and Boo could both be Friday the 13th babies. She kept checking in on our progress. During our last phone conversation before Boo was born, she dropped the mother's curse on me. "I don't wish you ill, I pray everyone is healthy, but, by God, I hope you get one JUST LIKE YOU."

Well, Mom, as you and Dad witnessed this week, I sure did. I hope you & Dad enjoyed the mayhem. We loved having you visit!

Nothing profound to say...

I miss my baby.

lean to the left, lean to the right, stand up, sit down - fight, fight, fight

BO won the election last night. I was not surprised. I liken the media backing and the hype to the Clinton campaign when I was in college. Well, more like the Clinton campaign on steroids.

In the Media, BO was portrayed as a super hero of epic proportions who will save the nation from all that is unjust. According to truthout.org and a whole bunch of other lefty sources of "information", the racist right made up lies to scare people out of voting for the black guy, McCain is George W's best buddy, and Palin is a clothes whore who should be at home with her children. But none of the lefties want to explore where all BO's campaign money came from. (Please, private donations of this magnitude in the midst of a recession?) There's no discussion about how he spent that money. Only one news source reported in-depth information about BO's associations with a known terrorist, a racist & hate preaching pastor, and the suspect activities of community groups such as ACORN. When I dared try to discuss these topics with BO supporters, I was told that all these things are either lies or irrelevant to the election. How do you figure? Because looking at the whole history of a man who's only human might destroy the super hero image?

The way information was captured, twisted and regurgitated by the left is disgusting and shameful. Very few productive conversations could be had without friends slinging insults around which is why I stopped talking politics with most of you. My opinion could not be expressed or questions asked without verbal attacks or a barrage of tainted reading material. When the discussions turned to politics on my birth board, a group of highly civilized women who share one precious thing in common resulted in hurling accusations, making fun of those who were less articulate, and ridiculing the opinions of others. One of my beloved lefty friends told me to go read newspapers with big words - implying what exactly? That I'm incapable of educating myself? I love my friend and I love the women on my birth board, but I don't love one-sided points of view and half-truths.

All that said, I wouldn't label myself a righty either. I don't think the government should legislate values. Women deserve access to safe medical procedures. All couples in a committed adult relationships deserve equal rights. I don't feel compelled to defend traditional values and morality because these issues are private matters. So claiming that all you do is in the name of God but refusing to see and accept that God made us all different for a reason... well, that's pretty lame, too.

I am deeply concerned about the nation's choice for President. In 77 days and the four years that follow, he will not make good on 95% of the promises he made during the campaign - except the ones that involve the redistribution of what little wealth we have left. Sorry to break it to you, but BO doesn't have super powers.

The country leans left then right then left, and we're all paying for the fallout from decades of corruption and poor financial decisions from the right AND the left. Change just for the sake of change won't happen overnight without a plan... without a willing commitment to be a part of change.

Even though I pretty much stand in the middle of the aisle anyway, I'll lean to the left to shake BO's hand and wish him success. And as a U.S. citizen, I accept that the majority has spoken and will support - not blindly follow - our new leader.

About the new job

Many of you have asked me how the new job is going. It's different. It pays the bills. Some days I feel empowered. Other days... not so much. Don't get me wrong, I'm very grateful to have found something so quickly after getting the pink slip - especially in this tight market.

I'm a contractor which means we still have to pay out the ass for health insurance & I don't have any paid time off, but the money is good & enough to keep us afloat. The position is with a huge division of an even huger federal agency. Thousands of people work in this building. (They have a serious parking problem!) I have to pass through metal detectors and have my purse & lunch bag screened by armed security guards. Inside is like a small city - complete with a barber, dry cleaner, bank, drug store, and food courts. Still, I tell people it's like going from Oz to Kansas. No offense to Kansas, but in Oz they have bright colors, free soda, & animated employees who get in all kinds of interesting trouble. In Kansas - not so much.

I'm working on a project in the HR Department. It's different work from anything I've ever done before. I spend hours in silence dedicated to one task without a single interruption. Most of the people around me have spent decades of their lives doing the same exact thing each & every work day. I'm not sure what the future holds yet. This project will eventually come to an end. Maybe I'll stay in Kansas. Maybe I'll be able to find a place way more interesting than Oz. Who knows.

Many of you have also asked about Hubby's job search. Thank you for asking. Thank you for caring. Sadly, it's not going well. He's had several interviews but nothing has panned out. He's used to landing with both feet firmly planted on the ground, so this is new territory for him. He's getting depressed about the whole situation and it's weird how I - the one who worries about worrying - find myself in the position of reassuring him that everything will be alright. In the meantime, we conserve and spend wisely - which is what we should have been doing all along.

In a lot of ways, this is bringing us closer together. It's not about Hubby and it's not about me. It's about the two of us taking care of each other & Boo as best we can. I know you're probably thinking - duh, that's what marriage is about. To that I say that I got married at age 30 and was used to taking care of myself. I don't think I really "got it" - the whole concept of true partnership - until all of this happened at once. We've become more of a team over the past 30 days. It would be easy to place blame and point fingers at each other, but we don't do that. I'm very proud of us.

Now, if only I could teach him how to load the dishwasher correctly.